Actual quotes from leasing agents while apartment hunting:
Here's our movie theatre room. It costs $50 to rent out. You can watch anything up to R rated movies in there.
"I sure hope you become a neighbor."
"Oh, do you live here?"
"No."
"Do you work here?"
"I guess."
"I don't like the squirrels here. They're creepy."
I was in an empty apartment when we heard a ghost-like wail coming from the adjacent apartment, so I asked:
"Pretty thin walls eh?"
"....My mom lives here and she can't hear him cry."
Another lady KEPT mentioning the FOX granite countertops, I tried to politely correct her by mentioning something like "Oh, I haven't seen faux granite much today." She either didn't get what I was talking about, or is making fun of me on her blog right now.
And the best was when the guy was fumbling with his keys for 5 seconds, got one in the lock, then after fiddling with the lock for another 3 seconds, pulled the lock out of the door with the key, then tried to put multiple other keys into the hole in the door before realizing the deadbolt was attached to his keychain. Then after a good 2 minutes of me standing there watching him try to shove the deadbolt back in the door:
"I guess we can't go in. I can draw you a picture of the floorplan...."
After which I reached around him and opened the now unlocked door.
"....oh."
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